Welcome To the The Mother magazine's Blog Carnival: "Friendship and Connection" The Mother magazine is a holistic, natural mothering publication. It is with great pleasure that we share this topic with such a talented group of bloggers. You will find links to the each of the other posts at the end of this one. We hope you enjoy them!
After I had my twins and the weeks turned into months I began to feel afraid the words may ring true. I began to feel estranged from my old self, as if she had died but I had just then realized it. I felt as if I were imprisoned in my own home, my once friend-filled life replaced with dirty diapers and laundry. I began to draw and write during the babies naps, trying desperately to cling to my old self, to keep her alive and for a while I felt happier for it. But old hobbies renewed are no match for the hole created by the loss of friendship.
Eventually, I decided to take the advice given to me. I created a Facebook page, meant for mothers like myself. Mothers of twins striving to survive daily life as I was. It was nice to have people who could relate to what being a mother was like and yet...it was not the same. These people could relate to the life of a mother yes, but they did not have the years of experience, of memories, I had built with my old friends. And so still, I felt as if the hole had not been filled.
I have lost many friends over the years, but there were those who had stayed there through it all. They had been there for every tear and every mistake I had made even when it was not always easy for them to do so. So why was I not striving to keep our friendship alive now? Why was I letting a simple label such as being a mother get in the way of something I had always treasured? Especially since becoming a mother was the best decision I had ever made, shouldn't I be sharing it with the friends that had been there with me through it all? Finally, I set out to correct this. I strived to make the time for them to be apart of my life as they had always done for me. Finally, the hole had been filled.
There are two things in this life that are important to me: friendship and family. While I do believe that it is important to make new friends to relate to me as a mother I find it is even more important to keep working at the friendships I have spent a lifetime building. To me, my friendships and my family are one and the same. Both consisting of people I very much love and both consisting of people I cannot, under any circumstances, life without. Nothing else matters. If I have to sacrifice a clean house for time with my family and friends, then so be it. So long as I keep those that are important to me in my life, there is nothing more important than family and friendship.
Thank you for visiting The Mother magazine blog carnival, read further and enjoy the other fantastic bloggers!
Hope in the Heartache, Light in the Darkness
"A child heats your lap with a fever that rages fire. Your chest heaves, holding an unimaginable weariness like a weight pinning you to the floor. Tears threaten at your lashes. In this moment you want to cry out; for help, for understanding..." Follow Starr and The Mother magazine • Facebook • TwitterThe Mama Club
The Dream Friendship
"For me a true friendship is built on honesty, love, trust and belief in each other. When you have a friend with this kind of connection life is so much easier, especially the journey of motherhood." Follow Vicky from MOTHERING A DREAM •••Twins and Friendship
"After I had my twins and the weeks turned into months I began to feel afraid the words may ring true. I began to feel estranged from my old self, as if she had died but I had just then realized it. I felt as if I were imprisoned in my own home..." Follow Miranda from Twinning It • Facebook • Twitter •••The Red Thread
"I feel blessed by the integrity of those women who I call friends, and am deeply thankful for the bonds that knit our lives together, even when we’re separated by long distances and busy lives. We connect at a heart level." Follow Veronika Sophia Robinson • Facebook • Twitter •••On Kindred Spirits
"At times, I envy the ease with which my toddler makes friends. When we are at the park, now that we're (mostly) past the how-dare-you-play-on-MY-slide phase, making friends is generally as simple as "I'm small; you're small; let's play!" And off Bug goes with whatever other little kid happens to be there that day, while I look on wistfully."
Follow Holly from Leaves of Lavender
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Where Moms Make Friends in the Digital Age
"Before the Internet, moms met each other at Mothers’ Centers, when they dropped off and picked up their kids from nursery school, at child birth classes, in their neighborhood where moms used to knock on each others’ doors for tea and a chat, and at work"
Follow Laurie Hollman, PhD • Facebook • Twitter